藍玥

Unit 7: Paragraph writing for process analysis

Paragraph writing: 180-200 words

    Topic: What steps does a successful job applicant follow?

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Draft:

As a successful job applicant, you have to prepare for some information or knowledge related to the company where you apply for. Before interviewed, you have to visit the company’s Web sites to know what kind of customers they served for and the commodity they produce. Of course, you must know the best-sell products and the reasons why people love it. After that, you should prepare for a self-introduction, including your personality, experience, the reasons why you left the former company, etc. If the company you apply for is a foreign company or international company, you should take a standardized test, such as GEPT(General English Proficiency Test), TOEIC(Test of English for International Communication) and TOEFL(The Test of English as a Foreign Language) for English aptitude test, and JLPT(Japanese Language Proficiency Test) for Japanese aptitude test. More certifications you have, more salary you can get. It goes without saying that you can easily be one of the members in the company. One last piece of advice, letters of recommendations written by your professors or former boss may leave a deep impression on interviewers.

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Teacher's advice:

To be a successful job applicant, (preposition:**you are not yet a successful applicant)) you have to get (get) some information or knowledge related to the company you apply for. Before having an interview, (usage) you have to visit the company’s websites (spelling) to know what kind of customers they served and the commodity they produce. Of course, you must know the best-selling (word form) products and the reasons why people love it. After that, you should prepare for a self-introduction, including your personality, experience, the reasons why you left the former company, etc. If the company you apply for is a foreign company or international company, you should take a standardized test, such as GEPT(General English Proficiency Test), TOEIC(Test of English for International Communication) and TOEFL(The Test of English as a Foreign Language) for English aptitude test, and JLPT(Japanese Language Proficiency Test) for Japanese aptitude test. The more certifications you have, the higher salary you can get. (The more---the higher)It goes without saying that you can easily be one of the members in the company. One last piece of advice, letters of recommendations written by your professors or former boss may leave a deep impression on interviewers. There is a saying, “Man can conquer nature.” That means if you prepare well, you can get any job you want.

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Revise:

To be a successful job applicant, you have to get some information or knowledge related to the company you apply for. Before having an interview,you have to visit the company’s websites to know what kind of customers they served and the commodity they produce. Of course, you must know the best-selling products and the reasons why people love it. After that, you should prepare for a self-introduction, including your personality, experience, the reasons why you left the former company, etc. If the company you apply for is a foreign company or international company, you should take a standardized test, such as GEPT(General English Proficiency Test), TOEIC(Test of English for International Communication) and TOEFL (The Test of English as a Foreign Language) for English aptitude test, and JLPT(Japanese Language Proficiency Test) for Japanese aptitude test. The more certifications you have, the higher salary you can get. It goes without saying that you can easily be one of the members in the company. One last piece of advice, letters of recommendation written by your professors or former boss may leave a deep impression on interviewers. There is a saying, “Man can conquer nature.” That means if you prepare well, you can get any job you want.